Change.  It had to happen in ME first.    

Not my kids…not my spouse…not my colleagues…nor my tutoring students, but ME.

It was my words, my responses, and my perceptions that needed to change first.

“How could you do that to me?”  Judgments had to turn to trying to understand them.  “What is in their heart that is making them do this?”

“Why are they saying that?” changed to “What lies are they believing that causes them to say that?”

“Why don’t you help me here?”  Quick shouts of frustration turned to being willing to ask for help and teaching them to look for a need that they can meet.

“What is wrong with them?”  Offence had to change to believing the best about them even when the fruit wasn’t there yet.