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I’ve Messed Up Again. How do I Stay Calm and Say the Right Words?

I've Messed up again. Q and A Thursday

“I lost it again.  I messed up.  I shouted at my kids.  They made me so upset; I couldn’t help it.  I feel like I’ve told them the same thing 100 times.  I give up.”

We all mess up.  We all shout.  We all lose it every now and then. 

Listen in to this episode of Q&A Thursday as I answer the questions, “How do I stay calm and say the right words for the moment?” and “How do I talk with my child when I did or said something that caused hurt?” 

We have covered a lot of ground in this Q&A Thursday, including:

1:38 – It’s story time! Listen in as I share my story. I asked again and again, “How do I know what to say to this child? To my husband? To my tutoring students? How do I stay calm and say the right words for the moment?”

5:46 – How important are the words that we are saying, thinking, and believing? Listen as I share my journey of evaluating my words. I also share how my intentional effort to watch the words I was thinking, saying out loud, and believing influenced my husband, my children, and my tutoring students.

12:35 – How did my journey evolve into what we have today: Speak Life Badges? How can we be intentional with our words? How can we be purposeful in speaking truth, hope, and help to our children?

13:46 – Maybe you like me have said, “I messed up again. I got frustrated. I didn’t mean to shout. I didn’t mean to hurt you with my words. I’m sorry.” Maybe you want to stop that default reaction of shouting at your kids. You want to say the right words for the moment. Then keep listening.

15:13 – What should we say to our children when we do or say something that hurts them? I share how you can be real and honest with your children and make amends.

17:00 – Speak Life Badges is your guide. When you get stuck, when you don’t know what to say to your child, when you are about to shout…instead of going to Google to ask, “How do I…..?” you can look up in the index at the back of each Speak Life Badge book the issue that you are having with your children. Then use the scripts and the sticker award to speak to the character of your child, who they are as a person, and who they can grow to become.

I am Special Speak Life Badges book

Still need some help beginning again after you mess up? Watch this short video clip from Kimberly.

Now I would love to hear from you.

What part of my story resonated most with you and why?

Important:   Share your thoughts and ideas directly in the comments.  Keep your comments positive, as no bad attitudes are allowed here.  Nor is judgment or criticism allowed.  We are here to cheer each other on in this amazing parenting journey together.  Links to other posts, videos, etc. will be removed.

It’s important that you hear this:

This parenting journey isn’t about perfection. I’m not perfect. My husband and my three children will tell you so. It’s about being purposeful and intentional. We can be both even in the chaos.

With enormous love,


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